A personal reflection on my journey in the pursuit of meaning

Ansh

  • grey christmas

    Wednesday 25th December ’24

    Today was quite a foggy day. We woke up near noon and it was quite a low-beat atmosphere, I guess everyone was feeling a bit under the weather. Me and my cousin dressed up in matching Christmas sweaters. I had an alright lunch that my aunty cooked. Went in and got our respective presents. I received some cologne and some T-shirts.

    We watched a film together and then I went to sleep bare early. Guess you could say I wasn’t feeling it that much today. Don’t have much else to write. I will be honest I am writing this stuff in the second of Jan so my memory might be a bit hazy on the events that may have happened and this will be true for the other ones as well.

    Also, our Christmas tree was like a fucking midget. I don’t know how my mum picked this tree but I can’t help but laugh every time I look at this shit.

    Anyways, I will see you guys on Boxing Day.

  • Varisu

    Varisu

    2h 49m

    2023

    Vamshi Paidipally

    7/10

    When you rate South Indian films, you can’t view them in the same way as Western films, as they are made in an entirely different way and have a different entertainment value. Keeping this in mind, I did think that this was a pretty entertaining movie. It had a decent story that kept me well-invested for nearly three hours, and the classic Southern exaggerated action sequences were fun to watch. It also had a good message for the viewer with a family-oriented vision, which I always liked. The movie was packed with comedic sequences that worked quite well, and the songs were decent as well. I also really liked the set designs in the movie, which really improved the immersion and the experience. Overall, it was a fun watch.

    Acting 7/10

    Cinematography 8/10

    Plot 7/10

    Immersion 7/10

    Score 8/10

    Payoff 7/10

  • Klaus

    Klaus

    1h 36m

    2019

    Sergio Pablos

    Carlos Martínez López

    9/10

    I think that this movie is an instant Christmas classic and a must-watch. It has so much charm, and you will be glued to the screen all the way through. It is such a heart-filled story, and even though it is a bit predictable, you can’t help but be fully invested in what happens next. I think the chemistry between Klaus and the postman is great and really adds to the experience. It is a great message and a feel-good movie that must be watched with the family. Overall it is a must-watch.

    Acting 9/10

    Cinematography 8/10

    Plot 9/10

    Immersion 10/10

    Score 8/10

    Payoff 9/10

  • How to Make Millions Before Grandma Dies

    How to Make Millions Before Grandma Dies

    2h 5m

    2024

    Pat Boonnitipat

    8/10

    This movie was the first Thai film I have ever watched, and rest assured, this film has convinced me to watch more. I think that this was a great and insightful film about family and why we should cherish our loved ones while they are still here. The movie feels so real when you are watching it, and it almost feels like you’re looking through a window and observing an actual family and their day-to-day lives and squabbles. The grandmother’s and grandson’s acting is great and emotional, and it never feels like their acting. The movie, however, is a bit slow and can drag sometimes, which does break a bit of focus, but it is not a major issue. I think this movie is a great gateway to showcasing the Thai family structure and providing insight into their culture. Overall, I think that this is a must-watch.

    Acting 10/10

    Cinematography 9/10

    Plot 8/10

    Immersion 8/10

    Score 8/10

    Payoff 9/10

  • Dumb Money

    Dumb Money

    1h 45m

    2023

    Craig Gillespie

    6/10

    I think that this was an average movie. I think it tried to have a vibe like The Big Short, but it did not work as well. It is still a decent movie in its own regard and is pretty funny at times. Obviously, having actors like Seth Rogen, Nick Offerman, and Vincent D’Onofrio does help add to the comedic value of the film. However, I think Pete Davidson should never be included in movies and I think having him in this actively makes it worse. It is an interesting movie to watch as well, though, and I think it is a great insight into what was happening to Gamestop over COVID-19. Overall, I think that it is a decent film and a good watch.

    Acting 7/10

    Cinematography 6/10

    Plot 7/10

    Immersion6/10

    Score 6/10

    Payoff 6/10

  • Khel Khel Mein

    Khel Khel Mein

    2h 15m

    2024

    Mudassar Aziz

    6/10

    I think this is an easily missable movie, but if you have time for it, it will be an entertaining watch. The dynamics between the characters are fun to watch, and the comedy is quite good at certain points. The movie’s premise is interesting, but I don’t think it is an Oscar-worthy movie; it is just a movie to watch if you can spare the time. They do have some decent messages in the film, which I think was good to see, and there were some unexpected moments throughout the film. I did think that the characters on their own were interesting, but they didn’t have the chemistry that I was looking for, so overall, it is an average to decent film.

    Acting 7/10

    Cinematography 5/10

    Plot 7/10

    Immersion 7/10

    Score 4/10

    Payoff 5/10

  • the hungover eve

    the hungover eve

    Tuesday 24th December ’24

    We woke up at my friend’s house after the party. I helped him clean up and got dropped back home by another mate. I was so fucking hungover and sleep-deprived today. I met my mum, who told me I had to go to the beauty parlour to help out. Today would be one of the busiest days of the year due to Christmas Eve.

    So I went to the parlour in Uxbridge and helped to man the till there the whole day. I tried to sort out my phone contract as I got another number, and being on call with them was pretty frustrating. I stayed there till 6 p.m. which was closing time, and came home and literally slept without even having any dinner.

    I know it’s a pretty dead day, but I think this entry reflects how fried I was today.

    Anyway, tomorrow is Christmas, and this will be the first festival this journal will write about. Wow, that’s so exciting. I will see you guys tomorrow.

  • don’t drink and fly kids

    don’t drink and fly kids

    Monday 23rd December ’24

    It was another early day today. This is like the 100th day in a row that I have had to wake up before 6 a.m., and I can’t be asked for more. But the flight from Ahmedabad was at 8 a.m., so we woke up at 3 a.m. to leave for the airport.

    We got to the airport about two hours before our flight and just chilled in the lounge. This was the busiest lounge I had ever seen; I had to wait 5 minutes for a free seat before someone stood up. I had some bananas, and we went on the flight. We actually nearly missed it, and they had to announce our names 3 times before we made it to the gate. Our next stop was Bombay.

    We got to Bombay, chilled in the lounge, and went around the duty-free there. I got some shampoo and went onto the flight. Now, here is where events take an unexpected turn. I was chilling in my seat when I saw one of my mates I went to Italy with walk past me. I called out to him, and we said that I would come to say hi when the plane took off.

    When the plane took off, I went to him, and we couldn’t believe we were on the same flight. We caught up and decided that we needed a celebratory drink. We called the flight attendant and got some whiskey. That started an endless drinking chain. I went up to business class and got some Black Label with Coke. This guy probably poured 2 to 3 shots worth of drink in a single cup. I think I had like 7 glasses and was about to die.

    I also tried to get my friend into business class, but someone snitched on us and got him kicked out of there. At least we tried. Now, we were on the seventh hour of the flight, and we had been drinking for the past six hours. I ordered another drink and drank one sip of it; I nearly puked all over the seat in front of me. I think that was the sign that I was done for the flight. I said goodnight to my friend, went up to my seat, and slept for the remaining two hours of the flight.

    My initial plan for this flight was to probably watch a movie and go to sleep for at least seven hours, but I think this was the better option. I’ve never had such a fun flight in my life before.

    We landed at Heathrow Airport, and my dad had come to pick us up. Today was another one of my mate’s birthdays, so I was meant to go home, get ready and drive straight to his. But I was still too drunk to drive, so my cousin and I decided to go straight to his from the airport. He lived very close, and we were there in 20 minutes.

    I thought that it would be a very chill motive, like he said, but this man invited me like every girl in the world, and I was there in my grey trackies, smelling like I had just gotten off a flight. One of my boys gave me a spare top, and I went and showered during the party. We came down and started to party. It was pretty fun and we were drinking and dancing till like 2 in the morning. Bear in mind that I had not had a proper sleep in like over 24 hours as it would have been 7 in the morning in India.

    Everyone eventually started to filter out until there were just a few people left. We were meant to smoke up and play some Monopoly, but I don’t think anyone could actually be asked to, so we put on a movie. I fell asleep before we even pressed start for the movie.

    Anyways, today was quite an unexpected but great day. I will see you guys tomorrow.

  • grandpa’s house

    grandpa’s house

    Sunday 22nd December ’24

    Today, we visited my mum’s hometown of Modasa to see where they grew up. It was an early morning; we were up and ready by 6 a.m. as Modasa was a 4-hour drive away from Vadodara. We had to be back by 6 p.m. to pack our bags and get ready for the flight, which was early tomorrow. We got in the car and went off, picking up my uncle on the way.

    It was a good drive there. We stopped here and there to take breaks and get refreshed. So we stopped at a service station, and when we went to use the toilet, there was this suspicious guy in there just looking at people coming in and out. I knew instantly that it was a gay man, so I avoided him, but one of my uncles didn’t know. So when he went into the stall, the gay guy went in behind him. Now my uncle probably thought that this guy was a cleaner and just wanted to clean the stall but, the gay guy went up to him and asked to “you know what”, my uncle pushed him aside very hard and shouted at him to fuck off. Well, that’s why you got to be careful in service stations in India, but this was just a very funny situation.

    Now we get back on our way and reach Modasa by 11 p.m., and I finally get to see my grandparents’ house. It was very run down, and the trees and shrubs had overgrown due to the property being empty for nearly 20 years. We couldn’t go through the front stairs due to the shrubs, so we got a ladder from the neighbour and climbed to the porch. We were opening the door, and a lizard scurried its way across the door; it was a very old house.

    Once we got inside, it was in much better condition than I had expected. It was just dirty and a bit old, nothing a bit of renovation couldn’t solve. We explored the different rooms and my uncle and aunty were telling me some stories from their childhood about the house.

    We met the neighbours and went to the first house they grew up in, which was also run down due to years of neglect. They showed us the store they always used to hang around with and introduced us to the neighbours. They also showed me the houses of the uncles and aunties who were their neighbours and whom they still speak to to this day.

    We finished that tour, and by 1 p.m., we were on our way back to Vadodara. We stopped over for some food at a restaurant on the highway and went onwards back home. Once we reached Vadodara, we were on a packing spree, as we had to get the packing done. I just ate some McDonald’s and went to sleep.

    It was a good day today, and I’m glad I got to see my grandparent’s house. Both of them had passed away before I was born and I do wish I could see them. But it was great to see where I came from.

    Oh, and I also saw a bus fall into a ditch on the way back to Vadodara.

    Anyways, I will see you guys tomorrow. I will be in London by this time.

  • a cheeky little dal bati

    a cheeky little dal bati

    Saturday 21st December ’24

    Well, today was a pretty chill day, not much to write about. I woke up at like 11 a.m. and went to do some banking stuff and took some passport pictures. I came home and watched a movie. I packed my bag to go to London and have some dal bati, which is an Indian dish consisting of lentils and round hard bread. It was alright; my stomach was fucking filled after I had it, and I literally could not move.

    We chilled outside the place, got some dessert, and headed home. It was a pretty normal day.

    I am not writing about other stuff right now cause I’m on holiday, but once I get back to the UK, I will be writing more broadly.

    Anyways, see you tomorrow